Young Money mogul, rapper and label executive Lil Wayne (real name Dwayne Carter) recently opened up for his fans in an interview with Emmanuel Acho about his struggles with mental illness and attempted suicide. The New Orleans rapper has spoken about his troubled childhood and his experience with depression before. However, this time the musician went into much more detail. Having addressed the topic in songs such as ‘Let It All Workout’ and Solange’s ‘Mad,’ in this specific sit-down, Wayne gave his account of the story.
Appearing on Emmanuel Acho’s YouTube series, Uncomfortable Conversations, the Young Money act seemed happy to contribute to the ongoing conversation surrounding mental health. Feeling the need to provide a precursor, Carter unveiled that he was doing it because he felt the need “to help anyone else out there who’s dealing with any mental health problems.”
The highly decorated rapper began the conversation by vividly presenting listeners with the nitty-gritty details of the day he attempted suicide at the age of 12. Elaborating on his predicament, Carter felt his mom would take rap away from him because of his poor middle school attainment. The emcee explained how he received a call from his aunt telling him that his mum knew about his truancy and poor grades. Letting him know that his mother was not happy, she emphasized that his rapping days would be over once his mother returned to the house.
Once Carter was made aware by his aunt that his mother was planning on stopping his pursuit of rap. He revealed this was when he decided to call the police and give them a heads-up. Speaking to the former NFL player, Carter said that as a young child, he felt like he had to prove how much he wanted to rap. Explaining his determination the New Orleans musician stated, “When I was told that I couldn’t have what I wanted, what I dreamed of and what I desired, I wanted to prove I was willing to die for it.”
However, in order to prove he was “willing to die for it”, Carter misfortunately felt like he needed to harm himself and, as a result, chose to shoot himself. Speaking on the situation, the rapper explained, “So that was a buildup. … Thoughts everywhere. [My] main thought was, ‘I’m gonna show you.’ so I picked up the phone and I called the police. I knew where she kept her gun, and it was in her bedroom.
Carter continued, “So I went in her bedroom, grabbed the gun. I had already made the phone call. I looked in the mirror, did like that.” He proceeded to point his fingers like a gun to the side of his head. However, the rapper admitted he felt that it was to far, disclosing, “Of course, I was like, ‘Oh no,’ ’cause I got a little too scared, that was my head. Like ‘Nah nah.’ But then I said, ‘F*ck it.’” When Acho asked what part of his body he ended up shooting, the rapper divulged, “In my chest. Didn’t feel it, aimed for my heart. And didn’t feel a thing, though. So I wasn’t going through any pain. It was the shock. I woke up to boom, boom, boom, to the police knocking. And that’s what woke me up.” However, the rapper did not die but was seriously injured.
Lil Wayne’s mother came home to an ambulance and several police cars outside her house. In shock, she saw her son being hauled out and put onto a stretcher. Acho and Carter discussed the environment of African-American homes and their often stringent nature. Concerning his mum (real name Jacida Carter), Wayne explained that the incident jerked a mentality shift from his mother disclosing, “So the mom that I knew before that day, on my life and everyone’s life in here have never met or seen or heard that lady again in my life,” he said. “So I didn’t die that day, but somebody was gone, she’s never been that way.”
Revealing that, strangely, the incident was for the better, the Young Money mogul aired how the event had a domino effect. He ensured viewers that, to this day, he and his mother have a far more transparent, loving relationship. You can watch the full Uncomfortable Conversations interview between Emmanuel Acho and Lil Wayne in the video below.
